Ben Marshall Height Please Don T Destroy

Let’s talk about Ben Marshall. You know him. He’s the one from Please Don’t Destroy who looks like he just wandered off a golf course. But here’s the burning question everyone whispers: How tall is he, really?

Spoiler: It’s a mystery wrapped in a very average frame. Ben Marshall’s height is officially listed at around 5 feet 10 inches (178 cm). But don’t take that as gospel.

On screen, he looks like a towering giant next to Martin Herlihy. But put him next to John Higgins, and suddenly he’s just a guy. The man is a shape-shifter of proportions.

The Optical Illusion of Ben

Have you seen the Please Don’t Destroy sketches on SNL? Ben often stands in the back. He leans. He slouches. It’s a masterclass in hiding your height.

He uses posture as a comedic weapon. One minute he’s a lanky goof. The next, he’s a compact bundle of fury. It’s like watching a human accordion.

Why does this matter? Because height is a joke in their universe. They make fun of it constantly. And Ben is the straight man for that joke.

The "Short King" Myth

Some fans insist Ben is shorter. They point to a specific sketch where he stands next to a door frame. They claim he’s barely 5’8”.

But then you see him with a basketball player. He looks totally normal. It’s a conspiracy. A height conspiracy written by a bored internet.

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The truth is: He’s probably just average. But average is boring. So we obsess over the millimeter differences.

Let’s be real. The comedy trio works because of these quirks. Ben’s height gives him a dad energy. He’s the responsible one who also fits in a standard airplane seat.

The Psychology of a Punchline

In Please Don’t Destroy, Martin is the hyperactive gremlin. John is the wild card. Ben is the anchor. His height is part of that anchor vibe.

When a shorter guy yells, it’s funny. When a taller guy whispers, it’s funny. Ben does both. He weaponizes his 5’10” frame like a Swiss Army knife.

Think about their video “I’m Not Gonna Do That.” Ben stands there, stone-faced, while chaos erupts around him. His height makes him look like a disappointed father. It’s gold.

Funny Facts About the Number

Did you know Ben’s height is exactly the same as a standard golf putter? He loves golf. He’s probably measured himself against his clubs. At least once.

PLEASE DON’T DESTROY — Pictured: (l-r) Martin Herlihy as Martin, Ben

He also owns a dog that is nearly as tall as his waist. That dog makes him look even more average. It’s a humble-brag of mediocrity.

And in their movie, Please Don’t Destroy: The Treasure of Foggy Mountain, there’s a running gag about a bear. The bear is taller than all of them. Even Ben. It’s a joke on everyone.

Why We Can’t Stop Measuring

Celebrity height is the ultimate trivia. It’s useless. It’s meaningless. Yet it’s irresistible. We Google it at 2 AM for no reason.

With Ben, it’s especially fun because he doesn’t fit a mold. He’s not a 6’4” comedy giant like John Cleese. He’s not a tiny dynamo like Danny DeVito. He’s the Goldilocks of funny guys.

He’s just tall enough to reach the top shelf. He’s just short enough to be relatable. That’s his superpower.

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The Ultimate Test

Try this at home. Watch any Please Don’t Destroy sketch. Pause it when Ben walks past a door. Count the inches in your head. You’ll drive yourself crazy.

It’s like trying to count the stripes on a zebra. You’ll get close, but the truth will blur. Ben Marshall is a fun-house mirror of height.

And that’s why we love it. Because it’s a silly, pointless rabbit hole. And Ben is the perfect guide for that hole.

So next time you see him, don’t ask “How tall?” Ask “How does he do that with his shoulders?”

The answer? He doesn’t know either. And that’s the joke. He’s just a guy, standing in front of a camera, being exactly as tall as he needs to be. Perfect.

Now go watch a sketch. Laugh at his height. Then forget it. Because Ben Marshall is way more fun when you stop measuring.